What bothers me about you, belongs to me. From a German saying.
That translates into what bothers you about someone else, belongs to you.
This is an axiom for personal empowerment; a fundamental law for human interaction.
Leaking Personal Energy
This is not just words. This speaks to the amount of energy you have for your life. You have more power when you heal your leaks thus altering your awareness of your self. Continue reading below… The Gift
The Gift is that each problem you judge in someone else is life giving you a signal to do a little healing within yourself. Why walk around with your open wounds so easily push-able? These are your buttons. Own them. Do a little self-healing and self-realizing, so that no one can push those buttons to cause you pain anymore.
A Masterful Teacher I had in my twenties, Frank Natale said: No one can reject anything about you, unless you have already rejected that within yourself.
Thus these friends, people, coworkers are actually acting as your GPS system for you to find your energy leaks, aka the buttons that cause you pain. Once healed, you gain more personal energy through personal empowerment. Give thanks for them playing their role in your life.
Own It to Be Present in Your Life
In situations where you may judge and condemn others, you are leaking personal energy. Most people think their problems are because of someone else or something outside of themselves. This level of consciousness leaks your personal energy out of you, losing what you could use for fun, loved ones and achieving your goals.
And you wonder why you are tired! You’re like a leaky water hose, losing power and pressure while spraying everyone else.
Just like real estate being all about location, location, location…
…Life is about consciousness, consciousness, consciousness.
Invest time and resources in bettering you. It pays a lifelong dividend.
Do something today to make your life better for you and those around you. Consider a coaching session. A trained person can see things for you that aid you in permanently patching the leaks in the flow of your life.
+ We have within us the skills, once learned, that lighten up life while improving it and allowing for a more fulfilling life of achievement, self-direction and self-management.
To the question at hand… Bending the matrix of reality
Yes, you can bend reality and you are doing this yet are simply unaware that your thoughts cause the results in life.
Thus my favorite topic… How do we tap into our inner potential to alter life?
I first learned precise thinking and visualization to cause a change within me or externally in life, in Malaysia as a young engineer living and working in Indonesia. These skills directly empowered me to improve my job performance significantly. And management started noticing my achievements and performance under those stressful and sometimes dangerous situations.
It truly is nice to be able to choose your desired behavior, task performance or pain release through lining up your thoughts in a precise manner leading to achieving with greater ease, less struggle.
When we make choices about what we want in life and practice living them within our own trained imagination we are literally programming our brain neurons to be able to recognize and act upon ‘the goal’ when opportunities start coming to us. It also sends out energy from your body’s energetic system to move the matrix of reality creating a path leading towards the desired result.
This may sound fanciful or too science fiction and it happens to be true.
As an affirmed geek I just luv this stuff. And it is practical, repeatable, follows laws and principle of the unseen forces that cause life, and leads us to becoming who we want to become.and to achieving what we are impelled to achieve.
Procedure to bend reality to be a path to achieve your results:
Select a relaxed atmosphere inside or outside
Find that ‘just right’ position to sit and get relaxed
Close your eyes
Place you attention on the airflow going in and out of your nostrils and mouth as you breathe in through your mouth
Hold it for a few seconds at the top then exhale deeply
Continue breathing in and out as your body and mind relax
Tell unwanted thoughts to float on like a cloud in the sky
Create in your imagination, using your senses, of having the result you are choosing to create in your life
Be sure to generate the emotions of having it. This fuels it
Spend a few minutes in the morning, midday and evening doing this.
Watch what life starts bringing you as new ideas and opportunities.
Click on Snoopy to the right or here to review my upcoming class that teaches these skills. Achieving Greatly, April 29-30 in Austin, Texas.
This is a one-of-a-kind class that synthesizes 3 independently effective methods to bring forth that inner power you hear about but don’t understand until you experience it.
Effective Communication Between Folks is Difficult When People are Busy Filling in the gaps of information with their own past stories from life.
This is a sliver of Brene Brown’s social research mixed with my invaluable training from The Natale Institute about this subject.
When someone is telling you something, a story or something about them self a phenomena happens if the listener does not practice effective listening. The listener will hear one or two points then their brain will take from one of their own stories from life and fill in the missing pieces. It then becomes familiar and understandable that way. That can easily lead to inaccurate judgments and decisions being made.
That moment is what causes so many difficulties. When people do not have facts straight they then share with others a lie that can be the seed that hurts others. If those added pieces were from an unhealed part of the listener’s past then that unhealthiness will be introduced into this relationship thus exacerbating problems. Everything is energy.
I am a licensed spiritual practitioner with the Centers for Spiritual Living, csl.org. In the 1990s the organization had non-accredited classes. One of them was about communication. I taught it and when I led this exercise it was eye opening. I whispered an event with some names and details into one person’s ear. Then that was whispered from one person to another until the final person said out loud what he or she heard. There was barely any semblance of truth to what the original story was. Each person had heard what was not there and added to the story from their own thinking process.
This also happens when someone is operating at a higher than healthy level of stress. Stress distorts thoughts and perceptions and does not allow us to be present to hear accurately.
This is why I like talking with people and being in communities where there is a willingness to verify what they think they heard and there is a freedom to clarify what was heard. But most people just hear what they hear, judge what they judge and move on thinking that they have accurately perceived the truth. Thus problems are propagated and the Universal Value of Unity is not upheld becoming, instead, an ego-driven value of separation.
What to do
When an atmosphere of effective communication has been established then defenses are dropped and hearts connect. Verify and clarify are important qualities to have in healthy effective communication between people. And, all it takes is an intent to connect with someone underneath the facade of life. There are specific skills that can be utilized and styles of communication that promote healthy and effective communication thus healthy and effective relationships.
Effective communication is a necessary topic that leads to an effective atmosphere to get things done in groups, businesses and communities.
There is a plethora of detail that I could write about this subject. And that is beyond the scope of one blogpost. I am attempting to present bites at a time so that the blogpost does not become a dry research paper 🙂
Open article as an Adobe file:
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Beliefs in what is possible, values in how life should be, moral judgements, conclusions made in unhealed past experiences, gossip you heard about someone, peer’s beliefs, family conditioning for life, and on and on… each is a filter to the lens that is between the raw reality of one’s physical reality and the cut, edited and deleted input your conscious thought perceives and you experience.
Think of it this way. When you put on a pair of glasses with a colored lens everything has that color tint to it. And there are colors and areas of life that cannot be seen with these glasses.
When we stay within our own life boundaries and beliefs that is all we can perceive in life as possible. Anything outside our self-defined life boundaries is sometimes not heard or recognized because of a person’s perspective filter. And the perspective filter is different for every single person on the planet. It is a wonder we can ever find agreement.
We are designed to see beyond our current perspective filters
Our physical eyes can only see until there is a wall, fog or physical obstruction. Our physical olfactory sense works as long as the fragrance makes it to the nasal passage in the face. Our ears can hear a sound as long as that vibration makes it to our ears. Touch works as long as it is within arms reach. And taste can only taste things that are on the tongue; of course smell has a lot to do with taste.
Thankfully we are born with a Spiritual Layer to us that has broader perceptive abilities beyond what the human senses can detect. There is a spiritual (energetic) sense for every human sense. We can hear, see, touch, taste, feel and know beyond the limits of the physical senses using these spiritual senses.
The third eye is the spiritual eye that can see beyond obstacles, around corners and through darkness in life thus guiding us beyond what we can physically see. The spiritual sense is without limitations like walls, dark periods in life, length limits of arms for touch, location of nostrils for smell, distance between ears and sound, etc, obstacles, difficulties, pains and more. They help guide us even when life has disturbances, disruptions, and the like.
We are designed so well for self-determination. We have free will to choose what we think, feel and do. No one can control that except us. And what we think is the beginning to what is experienced in life. We can learn methods to lift up our eyes from the human condition and the physical senses when life is not to our liking. This opens us up to a spiritual perspective, the intuitive mind and much inner guidance that will provide new ideas and a sense of direction.
Change your perspective.
Take a weekend trip.
Disconnect from reality for a day.
Imagine being in space.
Work with someone trained to coach you out of your accumulated life muck into a fresh perspective on life where your forgotten dreams, too-good and to-do ideas are still possible. This is a beautiful process to catalyze within someone.
When I do a P.E.A.C.E. Personal Energy Alignment, Clearing and Expansion Session for someone…almost every time they have a big change in life. Their perspective changes totally aligns more towards their true nature which is good, abundant, skilled, focused, etc.
One lady called me the next day and told me that when she got home after our session her dogs were not barking and her 2 children were getting along. The dogs have never not barked when she got home and her early adulthood children, one with special needs, did not get along together. She called to tell me that THEY had changed. I offered the truth is that SHE had changed.
One thirty-something man was walking down South Lamar Blvd the day after wondering to himself what kind of man he wanted to grow into. At that moment there was a book on the sidewalk right next to his foot that was titled What Kind of Man Are You?
I posted a new page under Services (the top header of this page) with my unique topics for empowering oneself, business, networking or groups of any kind. What makes these skills stand out are they work with your inner self as you are designed. Using applied sciences you will have skills to cause stillness, creativity, achievement and focus within your self and your life.
Everything is changeable and improvable with the right inner focus. That is my skill and honor for giving people a lift to make that change.
Learn during your lunchtime, a group meeting or a keynote function. You will receive clear messages, expansive concepts, tie them into personal and business benefits and provide ways for new empowerment skills to be used right away.
From Empower Hours to short class to custom presentation to teams to full experiential classes.
Empowering Engineer to Engineer Series:
I am an engineer and can present empowerment skills in that manner to the unique mind of an engineer.
Speaking About Using Your Own Design for Better Performance
Applied Brain Science for Achievement
Tune Your Performance Based on Your Design for Success
From A New Idea through Consciousness into Life
Custom focused topics for using Inner Skills for work
How These Empowerment Training, Skills & Services Work and Surprise Benefits for the Business that Uses Them
Physiological Stress Management, On Cue
Patient Empowerment in the Modern Treatment
Results through Left-Right Brain Hemisphere Integration
Focus Your Group’s Intent & Unleash Collective Power
Activating Your Genius Mind
Manage Pain into Elimination
Empowering Groups to Attract the Right Employment
Hack and Tame Your Brain for Exponentially Increasing Benefits
Aligning Your Inner Rhythms of Your Life’s Music
Activate Your Thoughts for Manifestation
Top 10 List for Crafting Empowering Goals
Shift into Your Empowered Feeling State
Customized Topics are available.
From one hour presentations to short classes and to longer trainings this material continuously trains even after the classes.
NOTE: The training portion of this material is done using both the logical and intuitive thoughts. A particular technique that specifically trains and ‘implants’ the material within the person causes changes real time. You are then empowered to practice and utilize this new skill immediately.
“If you want to know what you have been thinking then take stock of what, who, etc is around you in your life.”
One of Frank Natale’s to-the-point sayings.
Thought Creates Your Reality
Great thoughts yield a great life
Clear thoughts produce clear life results. Confusion does otherwise.
Deliberate thoughts yield a life of one’s choosing and loving
Reality is the Result of a process begun by the thoughts a person is choosing to imagine, feel and focus on in their mind and heart. It gestates in the Creative Mind where the unseen Creative Forces begin arranging for it. It is nurtured through one’s regular relaxed imaginative focus upon their life as they see it, as if it is already done.
If you are new to these empowering concepts or if you are an old hat at it… Study this previous paragraph and implement it. Practice it regularly and watch how new opportunities and ideas show up, how you synchronistically run into the right person or overhear the right conversation and other opportunities come to you. You simply begin to magnetize what is needed to accomplish what you are imagining into your sphere of life. Many other events occur in your life and in your mind and heart that are different signs. This is simply working with the Creative Mind as it is always providing you what your life choices have brought you to. Each of those choices made in your mind hopefully with great input from the heart-mind.
What are your thoughts when it comes to:
Are you in charge of your life or is it in charge of you?
Take charge and learn how to refocus it deliberately
Love of and for friends and family
Career success and happiness
Material world: house, car, other desires
Heart Care as in forgiving, healing and expanding your inner sacred heart
Mind care as in learning, challenging yourself
Spiritual growth and care as in learning, practicing
Emotional care is different from Heart Care although they are connected. More…
Consider a different perspective on emotions. They can be seen as e-motions = energies in motion. The e-motions you feel are your programmed inner interpretation of how the energies feel that are running throughout your body system and all around you. You can sense that in your head, your chest or other locations by quieting yourself and focusing your attention in the different areas within.
If anything, take some personal care time, grab a pen and pad, find a comfy place, play some music that brings you peace and focus. Then lose yourself in an hour of daydreaming, contemplating and expanding the thought box in which your life is being lived.
Contemplate what you desire in life from today to next month to the end of the year and bigger longer-term goals. Write them down. Play with them until they feel good; i.e. they are stirring up good energies within you that you interpret as feeling good.
Yes, it is a tedious process in what was just written. To parse and discern one’s thoughts, emotions and inner workings is to gain more and more dominion over your inner self…thus your experiences of life.
Ready to Integrate Some Change?
I enjoy helping people expand beyond what they ever conceived of doing. Or for the person who has held in a quiet dream or desire. Or for the professional seeking the next level up.
The resulting combination of the diversity of systems I have learned, practiced, licensed, etc to unleash the human potential studies assist through focusing on the thoughts, emotions, energies, sensations, life circumstances.
In this process the beginning steps will become clear. This is your journey so all of my focus is how to fine tune you like tuning an instrument. And to bring answers from within your own self to your life questions.
I find that when I am following these my life goes smoother, opportunities are more abundant and I am happier. Yet the normality of life sometimes settles in and I may start believing those old limitations, small self concepts and self-defeating thinking.
2 EZ Action Steps to Amp Up Your Game in Life
This haze of normality that descends upon us when we get caught up in the stories of our life can hypnotize us into forgetting that ultimately we have free will and choice in life.
That is why it is great to develop a morning practice that focuses on at least reading uplifting material to stir the beginning of your day with good thoughts and concepts
Choose/create an expansive question about life upon which you can consider throughout your day. (*)
These 2 actions will change your day. You have set your thoughts on an uplifting pattern that will lead your day. Plus your mind will expand contemplating an expansive idea.
(*) Ideas to contemplate: What will my life be like when I tune into the natural state of abundance? How much love can I embrace and emanate today? If it applies: How can I achieve my job goals with greater ease? I wonder what i can change to decrease the stress and struggle in (an area of life). How can I increase the ease in grace?
There are magazines and books available that have expansive ideas in them.
Some I use: Primarily I read the Science of Mind magazine, www.scienceofmind.com. It has daily guides. I have a different digital magazine emailed to me. Or I choose from books like the Science of Mind or Living the Science of Mind, Ernest Holmes. Another favorite is The Complete Works of Florence Scovel Shinn.
Someone who has come to some events shared with me that his intention is to HAVE intention. He shared more that he wants to improve his approach to life to do other things that will help him to deliberately focus his life.
First off, I can relate. We all can relate.
We are all born with a resource full of incredible inherent skills that let us choose and focus our life as precisely and deliberately as we dare to and to stretch as far as we are willing to stretch in this life.
Plus we all feel that internal universal nudge within to make a change here and there…until we successfully squelch it.
To have the desire to set your intent and live more deliberately is a transition step for the people who choose to live life at a different level, authentically and deliberately. You use a different set of inner empowerment skills (intent, choice, clarity, focus, listen, ease, to name a few) to drive life from within rather than the external modus operandi such as stress, over-pushing, force, make it happen, etc. Using the inner skills stirs things up and opportunities will begin to appear while clarity is received. That is when you take external action. Be prepared and ready for the right opportunity.
Second, thank you for trusting me. I appreciate when someone shares with me. I believe what we hold within us is more valuable than anything external to us. Thus when someone shares from within I value their truth.
I will know for him his higher truth while he is finding his inner inspiration (Spirit Within) to embrace this next step towards personal freedom and expression.
I find that I feel best about my life and move forward when I do this:
Read my written list of life results and imagine them to be already true, daily or more often.
I take my personal time: Several minutes to do inner focusing, finding calm within me, pose questions, get in sync, and imagine my day.
Deep breathe hourly to flush out the stale energies and bring in refreshing energies.
So, let’s take a cue from this man and set an intent for the week or month or maybe for your life or for this phase of it. It does not have to be elaborate. Make it a clear focus that resonates within you. Write it down next to your list of goals.
Take some time, right now, and write out an intent for your life. What comes to you? Craft some results you desire to have in life written as if you already have them. Write what you would like to experience in life.
And in case this seems too much consider: Why not try something different? One small inner change results in noticeable changes in life.
You have a friendship, a working relationship, a bromance or a romance with someone and suddenly you feel a little less heart from him or her. Slowly or quickly that person closes off to you. You do not understand or know what happened. And most people do not ask difficult questions to clarify things and many people will not tell the truth in difficult conversations. That seems to be the societal norm.
What happens between people in all kinds of relationships that slowly separates them? Of course there could be other specific reasons for that. I want to cover a phenomenon that some people may not be aware of yet. An impact on relationships that stems from the societal norm of being nice or the fear of being authentic. Maybe it is the lack of trained skills to develop and deepen relationships.
Foundation for this approach to communication
Effective Communication is when both people involved are willing to change as a result of this communication. More details on this at this blogpost
We create these blocks that can be called ‘withholds’ between people and we do not realize the impact on our closeness.
Every time you judge someone for something you lay a brick between you and them.
Each time you do not clarify a misunderstanding with someone you lay more bricks between you and them.
When you hear something contrary about someone and spread that to others you lay more bricks in a wall of separation.
When you say something about them behind their back you continue building a wall of separation.
You are putting up a brick in an eventual wall of separation if you keep judging that person without communicating with them.
This wall within you then distorts any perspective on that person. It affects your ability to see him or her accurately. The wall begins to fully separate as all past clarity gets obfuscated and covered up.
Then consider the fact that inter-human communication is at least 90% nonverbal and we realize that person has nonverbally picked up on our thoughts that separate us, also.
And we wonder why we have a hard time connecting with people in general. Our perspectives, walls and other foibles distort the clarity of who they are within our mind and who we are in their mind.
Any brick we do not reexamine to see if it can be dissolved will maintain separation.
Do yourself a favor – seek clarity – because there is an additional truth about these thoughts of separation. They exist within your mind and each of them is a block holding you from your own good. Even if the person is to move out of your life it is best done clean. Heal then do conscious separation.
Why am I writing more about interrelation communication?
It is easy to say you want to be more spiritual or be a better person. In the beginning good and new things are happening as your heart and mind open up. As you deepen that way of being in life you will have some periods where things are rocky, the shadow journey that brings such great rewards for those courageous enough to proceed through it. Find those people who will be empowered and empowering throughout life or the lifetime of a project.
Ideas for practicing this
Take a breath and relax. Hold the desire to be clear with this person in your heart. Ask the person if you could talk privately.
When you do meet: Preferably sit across from each other knees to knees almost touching. No barriers. If it’s true for you, then say how difficult it is to ask this or say this. Then ask it in a non-accusatory way; be curious with it.
And listen with your ears, brain and heart. Respond from clear thinking not defenses.
When you hear something derogatory about someone, do you and them a favor. Do this especially if this information conflicts with your previous experiences with that person. Take a breath and say something like hey, I heard something about you that I wanted to tell you (or to ask you about).
Some of us have so many breaks within us including me. This was a big relief and I am grateful that I learned authentic life skills like these in my twenties. I have been practicing as much as I could as I find people or rarely groups who resonate with this level of authenticity and are willing to do it. This authentic approach sometimes does not work for some people.
My training with The Natale Institute has kept me away from gossip which means ultimately you become the subject of gossip. Some people have to throw shade at others. Watch this truth: If you are listening to someone gossip then you can rest assured that the person who was talking gossip about someone else to you will now turn and gossip about you to that someone else. It is not up to you. It is that person’s behavior. Make a choice as to what you want to be around.
[Watch for a future post about the intent and impact of gossiping.]
As Frank Natale, The Natale Institute, defined it: Effective Communication is when both people involved are willing to change as a result of this communication. This can be expanded to include ‘all the people’ involved.
Qualities of Environment and People
Safe environment with some absolute rules:
All hats, positions of power, are removed and we are all one
Communicate at an authentic level to get clear
Benefits to teams and groups of people and individuals
Create an avenue for self expression.
Create an atmosphere of trust.
Then foster deep inner creativity which I also train enhancing it and accessing creativity on cue.
You can potentially create an environment that fosters an effective team or group of people or a humanity project. Teams who want to be a self expressive collective force to reckon with would benefit.
A commitment to Unity with another person. They have let go of the intent to separate.
Effective Speaking and Listening
The person speaking uses ‘I’ statements owning the impact with him or her of what was said or some event happened to the other person
The person listening is fully present feeling and hearing what is being communicated verbally and nonverbally.
[I will add to this post with more detail as I write other topics from this concept.]
This is sort of a post to define Effective Communication. I will refer to this post as I introduce some guidelines and methods to practice this.
I offer these empowering classes that deal directly with this including in an experiential learning manner. I was well-trained by them and I apprenticed with Wilbert Alex. I now comprehend broader applied sciences to human consciousness, spiritual empowering approaches and the matrix of energies in which we exist and can thrive as much as we seek.
Who would benefit from this sort of training?
Teams that want to be tight with each other, trusting in and empowering each other. Could be emergency crews, boardrooms, business teams, nonprofit, spiritual, medical teams, educational teams and others.
It is deeply empowering for those spiritual communities who seek to build a tight bond and trust amongst members.
Sometimes the Divine Source speaks through humanity for a major change. This thought-provoking dive into the depths of history, humanity and spirit is well worth the watch.
I have seen Marianne Williamson speak in person and on the internet. To me, she is one of the people I respect so much for her ability, depth of insight and willingness to speak God’s truth; i.e. speaking about the intelligence that drives humanity. Her website is http://marianne.com/
I know that some people do not agree with the politics of this movement. I am not arguing anything here. This is a look deeper into the current global movements involving personal freedom and expression – something that we are not going to see on the news.
There is something transformational about listening to the right message at the right time from the right person. Thank you, professor Beckwith. Love to you. Thank you for preparing the way for us to walk our best and expansive life of service.
I have been struggling with ‘getting’ what the last year has been about for me. Admittedly I have spent too much time trying to understand it, taking away from my forward-moving focus. I have had an enormous amount of #!%@ thrown my way starting in September 2010, so much so that my life does not even resemble what it was last year. THANK GOD!
I do not have the same income. 90% of it dropped away because the president of the training organization I taught for dropped me without a single consideration or word, spoken or written. This has taken some major adjustments to compensate for, mentally, emotionally, psychically, physically and spiritually; every -ly.
I do not live in the same place because I had to cut expenses. I found out that ‘friends’ ran for the hills. Many other traumatizing events that I do not wish to dig up right now. You can read hear what I did to get past it
Yes, that was the most horrifying place I have ever been as an adult. AND the truth is I was trying to fit into a global mind development training system that does not have room for an expansive soul. I have more to offer than that one simple method. I kept trying to squash myself, my visions and my ideas in order to fit in. I overlooked their indiscretions for more than three years. I finally got it: stop giving new opportunities to them to expand and update their method. They do not want it. And stop asking for help for my students because they are not interested. It was all falling on deaf ears. These opportunities must be for me.
I kept thinking “it must be me. I have to grow. Other teachers have been with them for over forty years. It must be me.” That is what the abused says to them self when they are trying to excuse the abuser. Some may think that may be an extreme place for me to take this to… it does apply in the manner in which things were handled.
Pain pushes until Vision pulls – Michael Beckwith
A Moment for Awakening
My life does not yet look anywhere close to where it is evolving into. Room for growth!
Can you feel the old, clingy, sappy, resentful energy in some of what I wrote above?
Is there an area in your life that you have some resentments?
Do you realize the price you pay for staying in that energy?
Has your life slowed down?
Do you find yourself complaining too much?
Are your thoughts full of bad thoughts towards others?
Is your energy for life low?
I heard Michael Beckwith say this:
A lot of chronic issues in life are a result of either:
Trying to extract happiness from a world and life that is too small for you and/or
That issue is bringing you a gift, a talent to activate within yourself (we’re growing a quality within us that is seeking to come forth)
When the 2 by 4s come fast and hard it is because you’ve broken a promise to your soul about what you are to do in this life. These are the lessons I set myself up for. They are coming hard and fast because I did not listen to the quiet voice within me telling me to make the change.
Truth is: I had three ‘readers’ who had told me in the previous two years to get out of that international company because they will screw you over. Those are the words of the channeler from Colorado and from an Akashic Record reader in Austin. I had already had many ‘small’ instances that I could have chosen to heed. Instead I chose to go along to get along just like the teachers that are still in the system told me they have had to for decades.
So, I had plenty of warning but I kept believing in something that wasn’t.
What I thought was a safe place to express my gifts to students and the world was not my safe place. It works for those who are still there. It does not work for me. They have the exercise I gave them that is being taught to the world, for which there was no recognition. I release that in grateful gratitude.
Minimal set points of society or Major set points for Living
Beckwith continued: society has set minimal points for which are good for us to follow: don’t cheat, lie and steal. But your calling does not vibrate at these minimal set points. There is no reason to squash yourself to just live by those. You have a greater set of points to live by and resonate with.
This calling does not fit into a small vision for living. It requires much more.
If you find yourself having a lot of difficulties in life change your perspective. Society has trained us to try to fit into ‘what was’. This requires you make yourself wrong, disempower yourself and shrink to fit into ‘what was’.
Instead realize that life is telling you to make some changes. Grow. Evolve. Expand your offerings to life. Live your purpose. Your new self does not fit into that old world. Say a resounding ‘YES’ within your self and mean it with all that you are.
And when your logical mind projects its fears into your future tell it: sshhh, I am in control and I am choosing to do this. When it says “but you do not have enough (fill in the blank)”. Tell it “I am doing it anyway”. When it says “I’m afraid to fail”. Say “I am doing it anyway”.
You are here to live a life of purpose. And Life is always conspiring on your behalf to bring you your highest good and your best life.
Let it. Listen to it. Heed it. Change, evolve and grow into your best life.
When you do this you give permission to someone else to say a resounding ‘YES’ to their own souls.
Blessings and share your thoughts and dreams in the comments.
Be Impeccable With Your Word. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. ~ Miguel Angel Ruiz, a great book ‘The Four Agreements’
(Some of you may read between the lines.)
I was extremely fortunate that once I had moved back from living in other countries being an engineer that I was referred to an incredible teacher, Frank Natale, who shattered my reality as I knew it; in good ways. He took people into the depths of their being and experiences beyond anything anyone could have imagined and beyond any teacher I have met to date… for those who were willing. It was all about being authentic to oneself, going into the depths of your own inner matrix and discovering who you are from the inside out. At times I consider it was boot camp for my soul… and just as tough with the best rewards ever.
One of the greatest lessons I learned from Frank was about gossip and effective communication. His trainings were experiential so he would set up exercises for you to learn lessons directly with the other participants. We learned the truth about the intent, behavior and content of gossip. And we learned what it says about the nature of the gossiper. These struck me deeply and altered the way I communicate with people, permanently. Thankfully this was when I was in my twenties.
Gossip is not the Truth
A cruel story runs on wheels, and every hand oils the wheels as they run. ~ Ouida
The first thing to learn is that once one person tells a story to someone then that person says it to a second person then it goes to a third person and by now the content is different from what was first said. It begins to barely resemble the original story and will soon become a pack of lies. For the most part gossip is built on lies by the time you hear it. I have done this when I taught Effective Communication classes in business and spiritual centers and it always occurs.
Gossip operates with peoples’ unclean energies
Good gossip is just what’s going on. Bad gossip is stuff that is salacious, mean, and bitchy; the kind most people really enjoy. ~ Liz Smith
The biggest lessons involved the ones learned by the heart and mind through those experiences. The personal energies involved in gossip are not clean. Think about the intent of someone who says bad things about someone else, especially if they never intend to resolve it to their face. Could there be anything positive that comes from talking about someone rather than talking directly to them? I know many people who walk away from gossip including myself. A person who gossips likes to work with negative energies. Like attracts like.
Fire and swords are slow engines of destruction, compared to the tongue of a Gossip. ~ Richard Steele
If someone desires resolution then they do what is necessary to resolve things. When someone desires to harm someone else they do what is necessary to do so. Therefore the intent of the person who gossips is clear… it is a negative intent that comes from one’s own malice in her own heart.
Gossip is a Behavior
He gossips habitually; he lacks the common wisdom to keep still that deadly enemy of man, his own tongue. ~ Mark Twain
The other thing to know about gossip is that if you listen to a person gossip about someone then you can bet your bottom dollar that when you walk away that same person will be gossiping about you to someone else. Gossip is a learned behavior. If a person gossips it is the way they have learned to do so. The good news is that we can always change our behavior once we become aware of it and desire to be better and better human beings.
Positive Facades are a dead giveaway
A real Christian is a person who can give his pet parrot to the town gossip. ~ Billy Graham
Another truth is that those who you meet who claim to function effectively in a positive bubble are quite often the ones who have the most malicious intent in their hearts. These are the rosey optimists who have a nice façade but you do not dare want to go deeper and find the energy underneath. This is only natural. Life is about highs and lows and our control is in perceiving them and adapting appropriately. Those who think that their lives should be just positive do not handle criticism or feedback… therefore it builds up and becomes malice. This can be a result of some kind of substance abuse that is not fully healed.
Requirements for resolution
To resolve something with another person there are 3 basic requirements:
Both people must be willing which means adjusting one’s personal frequency to the frequency of resolution
Both people must talk to each other not about each other
Both people must be willing to own their own truth in the matter and to listen to the other person’s truth in order to learn from it
Gossip does not solve anything since it is never addressed to the person for whom it would make a difference. It can never ever lead to resolution. Never! It exists at the frequency of ill intent towards others.
There is a great rule to follow: Do not say anything about someone else that you have not or will not discuss with them. This takes the negative intent out of your communication.
I know that for me, having worked in global corporations and other companies after having this training I was not someone to hang out at the water cooler, so to speak. I adopted a habit of finding ways to excuse myself when someone would start to gossip. That is when I developed my internal points of reference where I could detect the energy of someone’s communication and tell if it was gossip as they began to talk. I have been known to just walk away. I do not choose to be in that energy and to facilitate malicious intent. It is under my conscious choice and control.
I know that through the years I have slipped at times and corrected myself. And I know that I have picked up the phone at times to speak directly with someone who was important to me to understand what I was hearing. Sometimes these became a great clearing leading to a closer connection with someone. This is an adopted behavior that has helped me to find authentic people to play with in life. It has made for less quantity of friends but much better quality of friends; people who are willing to be real with each other with minimal facades and use clear, honest and effective communication.
The Truth is always revealed about the Gossiper
What I do know is that when there is gossip, give it enough time and quite often you will hear the truth about the originator of the gossip and witness how their malicious intent will come to the surface. Keep watching. The truth always surfaces. That is a law of life.
Note: I never have claimed nor will I ever claim to be perfect in everyone’s eyes. I do not desire to be that perfect presenter who claims no problems in life. My goal is to be authentic and to do my best to help others grow from my multidisciplinary trainings as a teacher. Therefore, as a teacher my life is transparent to those who desire to grow with me. Contact me if you hear something and desire clarity.